It's drink that uplifts

He's a fool who gives over the liquor,

It softens the skinflint at once,

It urges the slow coach on quicker,

Gives spirit and brains to the dunce.

The man who is dumb as a rule

Discovers a great deal to say,

While he who is bashful since Yule

Will talk in an amorous way.

Liquor is quicker!

It's drink that uplifts the poltroon

To give battle in France and in Spain.

Now here is an end of my tune-

And fill me that bumper again!