Hamster Man

He's one-half hamster, one-half man,

he rides around in a caravan.

He's six-foot tall with furry ears

(and 107 in hamster years).

He answers the phone with three sharp squeaks.

He stores ham sandwiches in his cheeks.

His wits are as sharp as his two front teeth

but he turns to mush when scratched beneath

his chin. Oh Hamster Man's the real deal,

running all night on his giant wheel.

He's one of a kind, there ain't no clan

of rodent men, just Hamster Man.